Happy Valentines Day

I made Ryder this tutu a while ago and I've been waiting for an occasion to dress her up in it.  Finally Valentines Day rolled around and I felt like I could justify dressing her up like she was a doll!



So I set up a little photo shoot and had these great thoughts of all the spectacular home-made Valentine's I was going to make.  Everyone was going to ooh and ahh and it was going to be fantastic.  Going to be.  However as is often the case in my life I had good intentions that just never came to fruition.  Please  imagine you just received these darling pictures on an ornately designed hand made card...







As you can see the cards would have been down right precious had I actually taken the time to make them.  Don't worry next year I will definitely think about following through!




Xoxo,

Emily

And They Call The Thing A Rodeo

2 weeks ago Mike had a date with destiny.  He rode a bull.  A real live, giant, monstrous, fire-breathing bull.  (oh wait maybe I'm thinking of a dragon...) 

On Monday we headed out to the Spanish Fork fair grounds (or something like that) and met Seth. (Mike's friend and co-worker who gave him the brilliant idea to get on the beast.)  After a good 5 minute lesson they decide that he a 30 year old man was ready to do something that most in this industry start doing at a young age and spend years perfecting and training for.  It all seemed very logical at the time. 
Here is doin' some learnin'

After Mike took the time to educate himself on the art of the bull ride he had the privelage of watching about 15 people before him get thrown and almost trampled to death.  Yay for building confidence!

Finally the big moment arrived and he saddled up El Diablo (that's what the bulls name is in my mind) and held on for dear life.

(sorry it was freezing there and I was shivering, and he was moving really fast, and my lens didn't have an image stabilizer on it.  I think you still get the main idea)

El Diablo shot out of the gate like a bat out of hell and Mike held on for a good solid 2 seconds...more or less.  Which is 2 seconds more than I would ever like to spend on El Diablo!

On the second buck Mike was tossed to the ground like a rag doll.  Luckily he's pretty quick on his feet and he had the good sense to get up and run.

And that is what my friend Garth Brooks likes to call a rodeo.

Here is what it looks like when you spend 2 seconds on El Diablo.  Damn you El Diablo, damn you to hell! 

The moral of this story is riding bulls hurts and you should not try this unless you are a trained professional.  Or you have 5 minutes of "training" from someone who used to be a professional.  The End.

Xoxo,

Emily

P.S.

Yes there is a video of this momentous occassion, but currently my video camera is being a worthless piece of crap and it will not load on the computer.  I will be sure and post it as soon as I get it figured out.

Christmas

Well another magical Christmas has come and gone.  As much as I love the holidays I must admit that I am a bit relieved that the chaos has passed and things are starting to get back to "normal".  Let's take a jog down memory lane and review shall we?

Let's start on Christmas Eve at the annual Ottley Christmas Extravaganza!  This year we were at Kolette and Kenny's house and a good time was had by all.  See the Christmas cheer on everyone's face?

Now Grammy does not take Christmas carols lightly and every year she holds several practices before the big day.  There are all sorts of musical instruments, sheet music and harmonies to be attended to so that we can all sound damn darn comparable to The Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Please enjoy the following images of the family singing.

"you go girl!"

fa la la la la la la la la

"let's sing the next song in a round!"

Even the infants and children are required to know their parts so they don't bring the rest of us down.

Now please enjoy more images of people "singing".

And now for a section I like to call "Precious moments at the Ottley Family Christmas Eve Extravaganza 2009".  Rolls right off your tongue doesn't it?

And now for a brief intermission before the next part of our program which will include Christmas Eve at home with the Mendenhall's.  Please be sure to turn off all cell phones and be in your seat before the curtain rises.

{Please hum an elevator version of Jingle Bells now}

.... jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way...

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Ok and we're back!  I would like to set this up by reminding you that all these pictures are Christmas Eve after the Ottley Family Extravaganza.  You're probably wondering why we're opening presents on Christmas Eve and not on Christmas morning. Well that's because my darling husband Mike has never been able to contain his excitement and wait until the morning so we always end up opening them the night before.  I even have to go so far as to hide his presents at my parents home because he can't be trusted and will open anything he finds immediately.  But I digress and this is a subject we shall approach another time. So on with the show!

Sugar and Roxy politely taking their presents.

Sugar about 45 seconds later after she has literally opened her presents.

As you can see Ryder made out quite nicely and I think she really enjoyed the variety or beautiful wrapping paper I chose.

I'm sorry did you think this was the end?  Yeah... it's not.  Now let's mozy on to Christmas morning!

We started off bright and early at the Chavez household.  And I do mean early!  Notice that it is still pitch black outside.

Crap I just realized I left out one of the best parts that happened between the Ottley Extravaganza and Mendenhall presents madness...  Do you think I should start all over from scratch or just insert that part here?  Huh, you say you don't care.  Fine.

Ok, ok wait one second.  Rewind in your mind and pretend that you're still reading about Christmas Eve.   I must say that this year my dad proved that the old saying is true and with age comes wisdom.  This year he thought of a fantastic gift for my mom...all...by...himself.  Seriously.

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Meet Daisy.

Ok where were we?  Oh yes Christmas morning.

Good thing my mom is pretty good at picking out gifts as well.

Remember the thrill of opening socks?  Me too.

Now let's fast forward (because this post is getting freaking long and I want to go to bed) a ways and go over to Mike's family.

I think this look on Chloe's face pretty accurately describes how I was feeling too.

Ok now we're going back to the Chavez home to finish off the day.

Alrighty then.  So to round off the day Josh and Nate had a "jam session" with the bongos and guitar, there was some Beatles Rock Band played, and lots of family bonding.

We laughed, we cried, we were getting ready to call it a day when something really special happened.  Are you ready for this?  Gather your family around close and try to vividly picture this in your mind.

 I'll set the scene for you.  Ryder and I are sitting on the couch and the whole family is in close quarters playing on the Wii.  My 8 year old brother Jake is close by and couldn't be happier.  What a perfect day, surely nothing could put a damper on our Christmas Spirit.  Then it happened.

Ryder straight up puked all over the place.  Like Linda Blair from The Exorcist projectile vomit.  I was covered, Ryder was covered, my mom's hair was covered and just a splash got on Jake.

You know that scene in the movie Stand By Me where they're at the fair and one kid pukes and it starts a chain reaction?  Yeah that totally happened.  Jake took off running down the hall dry heaving but he didn't quite make it to the bathroom.

Fortunately Jake and Ryder are the only ones that lost their Christmas dinner that night, I fear it could have been much worse.  What a fond Christmas memory that is.  I still smile whenever I think of it.  I'm sure Jake does too.

If you made it this far I'd like to congratulate you on a job well done and say you deserve some sort of prize.  I don't have one to give you, but I think you deserve one.  So until next year, Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Xoxo,

Emily

Hi, My Name Is Emily...

... and I'm a wrapaholic..

I'm told the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem.  I'm aware of my sickness, but I don't know that there is a cure.  In fact I think it might be some sort of genetic disorder... like premature balding or something.

I just love wrapping paper so much.  It's so shiny and pretty and happy.  This time of year is so special to me.  I go to the store and they have whole entire aisles dedicated to different wrapping paper!  Can you say dream come true?!  It takes every fiber of strength and will power not to blow all my life savings.  I just feel like I need a lot of different options available to me at all times.

Oh and my problem doesn't end with wrapping paper.

I also collect gift bags.

And ribbons, bows, and other decorative toppings.

I couldn't leave tissue paper out of the equation.

I would be lying if I said I didn't have a secret stash of cards and tags and labels as well.

Ok now you know my dirty secret and I'm not ashamed!  Who are you going to go running to next time you have a gift giving emergency?  Me, that's who!

You need something for a baby shower...I got it.

Wedding... check.

Birthday... I gotcha covered

Easter... you know it.

Christmas... duh.

Congratulations... for sure.

Condolences... sad but true.

Just Because... yep.

Martin Luther King Day... I'm all over it.

I think you get the point.  So try not to judge me because someday you'll need me, and when you do my gift wrap and I  will be waiting with open arms.

Xoxo,

Emily

Jillian Michaels Can Go To Hell

There I said it.  That is exactly what I think every time I do her workout video the 30 Day Shred.  The next logical question would be why are you doing it if you feel that way?  Because.  Because I am not the same since having a baby.  My body is a lot more...gelatinous if you will.  My clothes do not fit the same and I am tired of forcing my butt and thighs into jeans that I can practically hear moaning when I pull them out.

I know that I am very fortunate that all my baby weight has come off and I haven't been one of those poor women that seriously struggle post pardom.  Ok and by all of my baby weight I mean most of my baby weight.  Who knew that 5 lbs (give or take) could make such a big difference in your love handles?  The point is if I can't get back my smooth stretch mark free stomach shouldn't I at least be able to get back my pant size?  Speaking of "stretchies" as I like to call them, what a freaking rip off!  I know, I know, once again I am lucky and only have a handful of small light "stretchies" that didn't even show up until after I had Ryder and my stomach deflated.  Who am I to complain when some come out of pregnancy looking like they just experienced hand-to-hand combat with Wolverine.  But I digress, the point is I knew going into this I wouldn't come out the same but that doesn't mean I'm not going to try!

So back to the subject (and yes I am going somewhere with this rambling and complaining).  I hate Jillian, I hate her so much.  She's so mean to me.  And she hurts me.  And she's mean!  It's only a freaking 30 minute workout, but somehow during that time she looks at me through the TV and she is judging me.  She knows that I'm secretly thinking about cake.  She knows that I watch The Biggest Loser and eat cookies at the same time.  How she does it I will never know, but I'm certain that she does.  So even though I loath and despise her I also secretly love her and know that if anyone can pry some results out of me she can.  I am making this my End of Year resolution.  Not to be confused with a New Year resolution, which in my experience rarely pan out.

If you see me on the street ask me about Jillian and if I'm still working out.  And when I say "Why yes I am, thank you for asking" then you should ask me if I'm lying to you.  At which point I'll say"Ughhhh  how did you know?!"  I'm not making any promises but I am going to make a valiant effort so I'll let you know how it goes.  Wish me luck.

Xoxo,

Emily